Things your parents don't need to know about your college life

Your parents love you. They worry about you. They call to check in and ask how school is going. And you say "fine" or "good" or "busy," because the full truth would only make them panic.

Here's what "fine" is usually hiding. This is a judgment-free zone.

Sleep

What they think: You're getting a reasonable amount of sleep, like a responsible adult.

What's actually happening: Your sleep schedule changes weekly. Sometimes you're in bed by 11. Sometimes you're awake at 4 AM for no good reason. "I slept well" means you slept, at some point, for some amount of time.

Food

What they think: You're eating balanced meals at normal hours.

What's actually happening: Cereal for dinner. Cold pizza for breakfast. A protein bar eaten while speed-walking to class. "I ate today" is technically true but might be covering a lot.

Studying

What they think: You're staying on top of your work and studying consistently.

What's actually happening: You've started assignments at midnight that you knew about for three weeks. You've watched the entire lecture at 2x speed the night before the exam. You've Googled "how to write an essay in two hours" more than once.

The apartment or dorm

What they think: It's tidy and organized, like the photos you sent on move-in day.

What's actually happening: There's a pile. You know the pile. The pile has been there for a while. It will be dealt with "soon." Also the dishes are a situation.

Social life

What they think: You're making lifelong friends and having wholesome fun.

What's actually happening: Some nights you stay in watching videos alone and that's fine. Some nights you go out and stay up way too late. Both are valid. Neither needs to be described in detail.

Finances

What they think: You're budgeting carefully.

What's actually happening: You've spent too much on food delivery more than once. You've made purchases you can't fully justify. The word "budget" is aspirational.

Emotional state

What they think: You're handling everything and would tell them if something was wrong.

What's actually happening: Sometimes college is overwhelming and you don't want to talk about it. Sometimes you're fine. Sometimes you're somewhere in between and "fine" is just easier than explaining.

A tiny note

This post is a joke. But if you're actually struggling, telling someone, even a campus counselor or a trusted friend, is worth it. You don't have to carry everything yourself, even if you're very good at saying "fine."

For more honest content about student life, check out 21 things nobody tells you about college. And if you're curious how much your parents would panic if they saw your full Rice Purity Test score, take it and find out. Then don't tell them.